DNA by Microsoft?

I have been silent for a while because frankly, I have been avoiding the media. My brain could handle no more political saturation…the embolism was looming. I only have one more thing to say regarding the election and its cast. If Palin thought that she was going to avoid Greyhound tread marks on her ill-gotten couture, she is dumber than I thought.

Anyhow, moving well away from politics to cancer…well…o.k….not that far away.

I was watching World News tonight and I was fascinated by a report that scientists were able to decode cancer cell DNA. As I was listening to the report, I was struck by the parallels between the cancer virus and computers. Huh? Hang on…I’ll get there.

Scientists were able to compare the DNA structure of a cancerous cell vs. a non-cancerous cell in a woman who died from leukemia. Scientists have been plagued by the question of why cancer cells run amok and rapidly defect healthy cells in a human body. A very good question (I love those). What they found in the DNA structure of the cancerous cell may begin to answer said good question.

There were two findings that I found fascinating. Firstly, scientists found that some of the genes that would normally protect healthy cells from invaders were shut down by the cancer. Secondly, some of the genes prevented chemotherapy treatment from affecting the cell. This article at the IHT explains the process much better than I can.

As an ex-network engineer I said “holy cow, these scientist need to talk to some hackers”. I relate computers to these new cancer findings thusly (love that word). When your PC is invaded by a virus, the first order the virus has is to knock out any anti-viral program. The second order the virus has is to prevent any antivirus program from running that would affect its demise. See the parallels? Fascinating stuff right?

So perhaps Microsoft has manufactured more than PC’s. Maybe that is why many of us find ourselves crashing toward the latter part of the day and we have security breaches allowing cancer cells to run amok.

Well Duh...

Sometimes these studies kill me; I really hope we taxpayers are not paying too much for some of this crazy research.

The most recent one that made me go “for real” is the study that determined physical warmth is related to emotional warmth.

The study analyzed people holding warm and cold things in relation to their interactions with others. For example, people holding a warm cup of coffee are more likely to be friendly to others. Alternately, people who drink a cold drink or sit on a block of ice are less likely to give a crap about the other people.

Seriously? I could have saved the researchers a great deal of time and money just by explaining the logic. One genius even stated that mental processes are not separate from the body. Thanks Einstein…how much did that theory cost?

When the body is warm, it is relaxed, when it is cold, it is tensed up in an attempt to store the warmth. How on earth is one supposed to be friendly when their teeth are clenched and chattering from cold? If I were cold, enough I would have no problem telling the Pope to rot. However, if I am nice and toasty warm then I am relaxed and cuddlier. Hence, the term “warm and fuzzy”…there is no term involving cold and fuzzes or cuddles...look it up. Nope there isn’t. We have cold as a dead fish, cold as ice, cold as a witches tit (odd one that), but no fuzzes, no cuddles.

Stayed tuned for the next study…”Do Bears Actually use Charmin Toilet Paper Whilst Pooping in the Woods?”

Highfalutin’ Homeless…

McCain assures us that he is focused on the economy. McCain and his running mate have apparently forgotten that economic crisis equals frugality in spending and smart savings. Perhaps McCain should send Palin to a smart spending class and teach her how to focus on the economy.

$150,000 has been pilfered from the RNC account to cloth Palin and her family. Holy crap!!! I am a frugal person who would not spend over $20 on a pair of jeans; $150,000 would get me 7,500 pair of jeans. I would have jeans for 75 lifetimes. The $150,000 was spent since August, which is only three months. I could not spend that much money on clothes in my entire life. In fact, with my clothing budget at a max, I would take 150 years to spend that kind of money.

Apparently, discount stores are not suitable for the Palins, they have been shopping in the likes of Sak’s and Neiman Marcus. Admittedly, we certainly would lose respect for a candidate running about in a sweat suit but after all, she is the all-American soccer mom…wink wink.

One of the donor’s to the campaign said that due to the Palins modest means as well as the short notice of the nomination, he thinks it is reasonable to purchase a new wardrobe. However, let us not forget that Ms. Palin is currently holding a public office. One would assume that she currently had clothing to wear. She must have, it gets pretty cold up there in Alaska…you betcha!

Therefore, we are supposed to believe the fiscal idiot nominated for potential Vice President is going to help get our economy back in line. Evidently, Ms. Palin specializes in economics by feeding money back into the system on over priced clothing.

Alaskans’ should be mildly irritated on their own. Another article relates the travel expenses charged to the state for her children’s travel to some events they were not even invited to. The Palin children do not travel cheap either, nothing but luxury hotels for them. When I traveled with my folks, I was crammed into the back of a Toyota Celica with my siblings and slept on a pull out couch in a one-room hotel, and that was high style then.

Fear not, we have been assured that all of the clothing will be donated to charity after the campaign. They will deliver the clothes using the bridge I am selling them in two weeks. There are going to be some well-dressed homeless people out there folks. The money would be more appropriately dispersed if they were to find 300 people and give them each $500. The homeless could then purchase good meals for 25 days; I do not think pantsuits are high on their wish list. But hey, who said logic was important when running the U.S.?

Huh? You Sound Muffled...

To those of you still on the fence waiting for a definitive response on who is going to do what to fix the economy, get off, you may hurt yourself waiting.

What struck me about last night’s debate is what the “common folk” were actually looking for. The post debate interviews showed people who wanted specific answers on how the candidates are going to fix the economic mess we are experiencing. “My friends”, no one has that answer. We are so screwed right now that there is not a good definitive answer. In fact, our intrepid government “friends” thought the current bailout bill (recovery bill McCain? Please) was going to miraculously make everything all better. Think logically people…how in the hell could we unscrew eight years of idiocy with one stupid bill? Duh

However, I suppose the people who want the instant fix are the same moron’s that signed for their house and “did not know what they were signing”. I would love to see one candidate have the balls to say “hey ‘my friends’ you screwed up, figure it out”. I understand the predatory lending argument but honestly, “guns don’t kill people, people kill people”. Take responsibility for being an impatient greedy society.

The hypocrisy is overwhelming in this country. Folks do not have a problem pointing a finger and calling the fat cat executives greedy but keep in mind, most of the finger pointers are the ones that put themselves in a house they could not afford to begin with. Hello kettle…”your friend” the pot here.

Therefore, in my humble opinion, until Americans wake up and accept responsibility for their own actions, it will not matter what plan the candidates have, we will still be screwed for the next eight years or so. “Say it ain’t so Lori…are you sure?”. You betcha (wink wink).

Thought experiment time. The economy is in the crapper and folks are being foreclosed on and paying higher prices for gas. Therefore, we can assume that money is tight. However, credit is still there for some. Folks are not going to deny little Johnny his activities because that may damage him or make him responsible. In order to support little Johnny’s ego and avoid tantrums, Mum and Dad will be turning to what little credit is left on their cards. Around January or so, Johnny’s folks will not be able to pay the credit card bill. Oops…there go the credit card companies in the toilet as well. Imagine what 2009 will be like when people have no access to liquid cash at all.

One more note relating to this cartoon like campaign. I found the delegate votes very interesting last night. According to CNN’s Electoral Map Calculator Obama currently has 264 votes compared to McCain’s 174. Additionally, either candidate only needs 270 electoral votes to win the presidency. So again people, do your votes REALLY matter???

Stay on the fence, jump over it, jump through it, I cannot care anymore…just make sure you do not damage your grey matter if you land flat on your ass.

Things I HATE...

So, o.k. I have accepted we live in an instant society but I don’t have to like it. I am tired of the acronym ASAP (which in my mind stands for Assholes Suck At Planning) and those little red exclamation points on emails drive me insane.

Why do assholes think their priority is more important than anyone else’s is? Will the planet implode if the bloody invoice does not get out today? Seriously, in my line of work (accounting) there are NO emergencies…none. Brain surgery maybe, rocket science more than likely, Senate decisions most definitely but not freakin accounting.

The author apologizes for the personal rant. The above is something she promised not to do on this blog. However, appease your irritation with the knowledge that many ignorant lives were saved through the venting of the author. Thank you for your patience.

What's that Sound?

Could it be a coup I hear? I have money on the table that says the current shrub in charge will extend his term using economic catastrophe as a reason. I posted awhile back about how I thought he would extend power through terrorism and marshal law but the plot has changed.

Did you know that the presidential directive from May 2007 gives the current shrub and all of his weeds dictatorship power in the event of a catastrophic emergency (item 2 b). The catastrophic emergency encompasses economic crises. The word depression has been bandied about low-level panic has been instilled and the sheep are being herded.

Look forward to seeing the administration causing more panic in the next couple of weeks. We Americans should be used to the manipulation tactics by now. Whenever the current shrub in charge wanted something before, we were raised to yellow alert or threatened that our retirement funds were going in the toilet.

I will say that some mild panic is in order now. However, try to maintain logic and a cool head.

For example, if the current bail out works, the average family can look forward to an additional $10,000 in taxes next year. Of course, logic says that if you increase the taxes on the responsible ones, they will not maintain responsibility. We are a country living paycheck to paycheck. If the government takes that extra $800 per month out of the average family’s income, some bills will not be paid. More than likely the credit cards will be the first to be ignored. Of course, this means that we will again be bailing out the financial institution.

Additionally, any hope of saving for retirement will be legitimately in the toilet, especially when the tax benefit disappears.

As a footnote, MrM sent me this article that expresses quite succinctly what I am thinking but too afraid to voice.

The sound is getting louder and the administration is settling in for a nice long roost.

Just When You Thought...

Just when you thought government could not get more screwed up, enter Sonny Perdue the illustrious man in charge of Georgia. Honestly, do we have to wait over two hours for gas? Should there even be a gas shortage in this area? The answer to both questions is a resounding no. However, as per the norm, our intrepid leader waited until crisis time prior to taking action and, lied to the media about the action he did not take.

Apparently, we here in Georgia are required by the EPA to use “boutique” fuel because our pollution is terrible. As such, we have limited areas where we can acquire said fuel. The Georgia government boys responded properly after Katrina and requested a temporary lift of the fuel guidelines. The result was only one or possibly two days of complete chaos. One would think with the state Texas is in the same logic would have been applied in this situation. However, it has now been about two weeks of the insanity and Perdue only filed the appeal YESTERDAY!

I would probably bitch a little bit less if we here in Metro-Atlanta actually had public transit options. Some of us do but most of us in the Burbs are screwed. We do not even have the option to walk or ride without increasing our life insurance policies. Nevertheless, fear not, our local government is planning to spend billions of dollars adding lanes to our current infrastructure. I do not think I would mind increased taxes if I had options that did not involve gas.

Do not think too much…that will make them appear even more screwed up. Baaaaaa

Shooting Fish...

This really is like shooting fish in a barrel; I could go on for hours about the lunacy of the Republicans choice for V.P. However, after a time people will tire of nodding their head so I will only shoot a couple of fish.

I could not actually bring myself to watch the interview with Palin last night. After all, it was around the dinner hour and my digestive tract is delicate. However, I did pop online this morning to read a bit. At least with reading I minimize the voices in my head.

The highlight for me was when Charlie Gibson asked Palin about her insights into recent Russian actions. Mind you, McCain has already defended her qualifications regarding Russia based on proximity. Palin’s response to Gibson was and I quote "They're our next-door neighbors and you can actually see Russia from land here in Alaska, from an island in Alaska." Holy crap!!!!

Well based on the previous statement by Palin, I am now going to be practicing law. After all, I can look out my office window and see the law office next door therefore; I am qualified to take on clients. Those of you who know about logical statements should have at least groaned at that stretch. Bring on the law suits!!

Frankly, going on about the interview would waste valuable brain cells. I am trying to keep my brain cell store in tact to prepare for old age. Let me just say that Palin is either a dippy ex-Miss America wanna-be or someone in the McCain campaign played a very mean joke on her through lack of preparation.

Here is the article. Fish for dinner anyone??

Big Bang or Large Boom??

I have been waiting patiently for the Large Hadron Collidor (LHC) to be turned on. Finally, as of yesterday, the switched was flipped. For those of you unaware, the LHC is a 17-mile long cylindrical tunnel 300 feet in the Earth below the Franco-Swiss border. The purpose of this atomic racetrack is to smash subatomic particles and observe the results. Scientists from across the globe are hoping to discover new particles as well as answer questions relating to the big bang theory.

I admit I am no scientist but I have to wonder at the safety of such a test. Mind you, I am thrilled at new science and frontiers but I still wonder. One would think that the actual big bang (if true) formulated our entire universe. That is one hell of a bang. So logically, how can we assume that a 17-mile long cylinder no matter how well built will contain the next big bang? Admittedly, this is on a much smaller scale but let’s just say I won’t be buying real estate near Geneva anytime soon.

I am very excited to find out what happens though. So far, they have sent the beam clockwise. Next, the scientists will send the beam counterclockwise. At some point, two beams will be sent in opposite directions. Then we will all be witness to history being made in the new discovery of answers to the big bang or the annihilation of the Franco-Swiss border.

Here is an informative article.

Bzzzzt...poof

Well I am finally reading a book worth recommending. I picked up Einstein His Life and Universe written by Walter Isaacson…I highly recommend it. Einstein is an idol of mine and I have attempted in the past to read his papers and essays. Unfortunately, my synopses promptly electrocuted my frontal lobes. The process enabled me to develop my own theory of relativity…the decimation of my brains cells is directly related to the absorption of concepts over my head.

However, the book I am reading explains Einstein’s theories in a way that even a simpleton like me can finally understand. Do not get me wrong, this is no Dr. Seuss writing but I was excited to discover that I could stay one-step ahead of the thought exercises. I also find the insight into the man himself to be very interesting.

I have always been a question asker (I know improper grammar…get over it). I used to read the dictionary for fun and the dictionary and encyclopedias were my first “Google”. After I was externally mobile, I spend scads of time in the library. I would ask questions and then challenge myself to find the answers. I believe the definition of a smart person is one who knows the questions to ask not the one with all the answers.

Therefore, even though this book is eliciting smoke from the ears, it has me thinking and I did not realize how much I missed that. I have been in my job for over two years and there are no more challenges. I have become bored and uninteresting. I guess that means it is time to start asking questions again…look out grey matter….bzzzt…poof!

Pass the Remote...

Humanity has reached a new pinnacle. I will not say I have seen it all but I am getting closer as my aneurism looms nearby. Scientists have finally discovered a drug to fool the body into exercising without the tedious effort of actually moving (article).

I will state that if you read the article, you will discover that perhaps the drug may help people who otherwise could not exercise. However, the article mentions couch potato too many times so we intelligent folk can figure out to whom the drug is being aimed.

How lazy do you have to be? We have remote controls because we can’t be bothered with moving five feet to change a station. We have drive-thru restaurants because there is too much effort to walk a hundred yards. Additionally, the drive-thru restaurants allow us to grab food quickly because the effort to cook is exhausting. There are even robotic (insert expletive here) vacuum cleaners!! Now, exercise in a pill! Soon we won’t have to get out of bed. Slowly, the human race is… well…making the human race…ah…obsolete. Maybe the creators of the Matrix are on to something.

My doctor, rather profoundly, explained the concept of exercise inherent in our DNA. She said that exercise is programmed into our genetics from the days when humans had to hunt for food. She told me there is no quick fix and if one is too lazy to exercise and eat properly, be fat and quit whining.

We are a lazy society…but why…impatience. Let us blame the shipping companies. Some time ago, we would order a product and we would have to wait for it to arrive. However, we can now order a product from half way around the world and have it delivered overnight. The overnight phenomena meant that workers could no longer say to the boss “That proposal will have to wait because the documents won’t be here until next week.”. Oh no, thanks to the shipping companies, we can’t get a break. Broaden that thought and think of the poor people working for the shipping companies…yikes.

Our impatience has had a ripple effect across our lives. Most are tied to their jobs through PDA’s, they are connected 24 x 7. We feel guilty taking time off from work and many are still connected while on vacation. In fact, comparing average vacation time in the U.S. to the rest of the world shows Americans work too much. Even our national holidays have suffered attrition through the years. Without down time it is no wonder we are lazy in our own lives.

We are in too much of a hurry and need to slow down. A magic pill will not help. I can guarantee that the exercise pill will have some type of freaky side effect. I have a feeling the side effect will have something to do with cardiac explosion. Pills are not the answer to all ailments and frankly, all the medicating does is bring profits to pharmaceuticals and disastrous side effects to the medicated.

Now where is the damn remote….

Consequences...

The problem with Americans is that we do not seem to have to face the consequences of our actions. The following rant stems from recent legislation that assists those homeowners facing foreclosure (article). Mind you, I think it would be terrible to have thousands of homeowners chucked to the curb. However, there has to be consequences to ones actions.

Four years ago, I purchased my second home. At the time, the bank approved a mortgage $80,000 above of my comfort zone. Of course, the realtor attempted to show me homes at the top of my approved amount but I put my foot down. I was smart enough to figure out what I could afford with my current earnings. Additionally, I looked at a worse case scenario and figured out what I would be comfortable paying at less earnings. I also avoided interest-only loans as if they were the plague. My thinking was not rocket science so how did others fall into the trap.

American society is riddled with folks who want instant gratification and too much is never enough. Many of the people who are being bailed out had no business getting into the homes they are being kicked out of. Why would one not make the mortgage the priority payment? If I were to lose my job tomorrow I could find any job at any salary and make sure I could pay my mortgage. The rest of my bills can rot…the roof over my head is priority.

I am tired of being responsible in an irresponsible society. The hardworking responsible people are going to pay for the ignorant decisions of others as usual. In addition, the irresponsible people will have their entitlement fulfilled. Because we all know that, it isn’t the fault of the people being foreclosed on; they did not make the decision to buy out of their comfort zone. Those damn mortgage people did this to them so they are entitled to assistance. If that is the case, let’s call the law what it really is “Assistance to Stupid Subjects of the United States” (ASSUS).

When will there be legislation giving the responsible people a tax break for not causing a burden on society? When are the responsible people going to see the consequences of their actions?

Social Responsibility...

I was discussing the sudden rise in crime among teenagers with a friend. I found the idea of society having a greater impact on the upbringing of children, rather than their parents, interesting.

I have based my theory around social interference. For example, there was a time when a parent was free to use spankings to rear their children. However, society determined that spankings led to child abuse and that would not be tolerated. Therefore, the methods of punishment offered to a parent dwindled to “time-outs”. Of course, parents also were encouraged to pursue logical discussions with their children so the young-uns would understand the reasons for their time-outs.

Most smart adults realize that when dealing with a three-year old, logical discussion is not an option. Sometimes a good whack on the backside and a firm “no!” is the only solution to a purple faced demon possessed child.

Of course, in order to be politically correct I must say I do not condone the beating of children. However, I do know that when in the middle of a fit, a child is unable to listen to reason. A smack on the bottom jars them to attention and corrective action can follow. Additionally, I still see the reports of child abuse on the news. Time-outs did not eradicate the heinous crime of child abuse.

Now years later, we are seeing the results of the social do-gooders. Children have become obnoxious. I know my elders said the same thing about young people’s disrespect; however, the young people today are downright scary. Most have an entitlement complex and absolutely no respect for others in society.

Oddly, enough when teenagers get into trouble; the first thing society says is the parents are at fault. Now I will admit, some people should have sworn off procreation but society must realize that “they” took away discipline options. If society wants to butt into the rearing of the children by proclaiming spanking a sin, then society should take responsibility when the youngsters turn out rotten.

I TOLD You So...

I am not even going to deny it...I LOVE that phrase because I LOVE being right.

I posted earlier about the waste of time in visiting Mars AGAIN. I believe the challenge was to determine which picture was Mars and which was good ole Georgia red clay. I have been vindicated.

According to a report on CNN.com (here) the first testing of the soil that the lander pulled from the barren planet is remarkably similar to the soil found in backyards on Earth. Apparently scientist have discovered they can plant asparagus, green beans, and turnips on the far away oasis. Imagine produce prices then!!!!

So HA!

Friday Funny...

List of the day pointed me to this ad on Craigslist...hilarious.

Ferocious Attack Kitten (Portland)
Reply to: mailto:comm-733066123@craigslist.org?subject=Ferocious%20Attack%20Kitten%20(Portland)Date: 2008-06-26, 1:20AM PDT

Ferocious attack kitten is available for adoption to any home willing to accept him.

This destructive kitty has been trained as a proud warrior and will fiercely defend your house, even against you. Well-trained since 10-weeks of age to attack anything in his presence, he will protect your family from evil things, including the following:

* insects

* other trained attack kittens

* babies * toilet paper

* anything under a blanket

* unwanted house guests

* paper bags

* floor rugs

* Chuck Norris

* Feet.

Great with children (assuming you don’t like the children). Probably best used for professional catfighting. He is housebroken, but only because he wants to be. This attack cat has trained himself to seek out his food anywhere you hide it and rip the bag open to feed himself, great for those who travel extensively. Also trained to drink water out of toilet bowls and dishwater from items in the sink. Knows how to open some doors. He will find you wherever you hide.

Neutered (trust me, you wont want to him to procreate). Has not been declawed, but you'll figure that out really fast.

Understands and responds to a variety of vulgar and profane verbal commands. Has a very soft and furry belly, like a teddy bear - however he will bite your face if you try to touch it.

Willing to accept trades. Potential adopters must have experience with trained attack-kittens... please be prepared to show scars.

For the love of God, someone please take this thing out of my house.

It's Official...

The “officials” of our country are delusional. Literally…

Recently, the Saudi’s agreed to produce 200,000 additional barrels of oil a day to meet the “demand”. This move should help to reduce gas prices…right. The move would be successful if demand were the only issue involved. However, as prices are ridiculous, one would assume that demand has in fact been reduced (in consuming countries). That assumption comes from simple logic.

Astoundingly, the Suadi’s agree with me, how cool is that! In fact, according to King Abdullah, the crappy American dollars, as well as the greedy market players taking advantage of the guaranteed hike in gas prices are the major factors hiking up prices. Both of these assumptions make perfect sense to me however, according to our crackpot “officials” the logic presented is a load of crap.

Our “officials” are citing an increase in demand of developing economies as well as the additional taxes of consuming countries. I am unable to accept the lame argument of the U.S. “officials” in light of everything else our country is currently experiencing. I admit that these are factors in the prices, however; they are minute at best.

It would appear the “officials” are adopting the elephant in the room philosophy. The question is why? Are they pretending the obvious does not exist out of pride, or perhaps they do not want to show weakness? Would it not make more sense to accept the obvious than look like buffoons to the entire world?

Even quasi-intelligent people like me understand that continued talk of wars with Iran, the less than stellar economy, and the pitifully weak American dollar are the real problem. If the “officials” continue to ignore the elephant, I hope they keep their mouths shut. You know something is dreadfully wrong when the King of the country that produces the largest amount of oils says, “There is no justification for the (high)…price(s)”.

Our officials need to focus in another direction to gain control of America’s downward spiral. My next goal is to determine the parallels between our current situation and the downfall of the Roman Empire. I know they are there…stay tuned…

Info derived from http://abcnews.go.com/WN/PainAtThePump/story?id=5221828&page=1 .

Fallen Idol...

I can count how many people have genuinely effected my personal growth on one hand. George Carlin occupies the forefinger of my right hand.

I remember the day I was able to get my own video rental membership. I zipped down to the store with phone bill and license in hand and promptly rented all of the George Carlin videos in stock. I sat for hours absolutely enthralled by the genius in which Mr. Carlin melded words together and made them funny. It was the day that the word “fuck” became my favorite word. Although, the “f” word is not so lady like, when used properly, the word can inject belly laughing humor. Mr. Carlin injected the word with brilliance.

Much to his credit, Mr. Carlin did not depend on crass language to be funny; he also stimulated our intellect by looking at everyday things around us. Mr. Carlin made us realize how silly we can be driving our cars, how inane our government can be, and how ridiculous religious zealots are. He made us think and laugh at the things most would not discuss in polite company. He was truly a genius.

Mr. Carlin can also be credited with removing verbal barriers when he faced the FCC in 1978 (http://www.georgecarlin.com/dirty/dirty3.html ). His original seven dirty words landed him in jail but the case was eventually dismissed breaking new ground for public speech.

I am not good at eulogies; I just wanted to take a minute to thank the forefinger of my right hand for allowing me to view the world intellectually with just a hint of cynicism. Thank you Mr. Carlin…I hope the afterwards is all you expected.

“We’re all fucked. It helps to remember that.” –George Carlin

Head is Where...?

Do the collective "we" even pay attention? I would have to believe that if a masked man where to come into our homes wanting to rape us and steal our money, we would do something. Scream, rant, kick, bite...

MrM brought yet another irritant to my attention that I am not sure everyone is paying attention to. I watched a senate hearing on the matter; well I had to turn it off as my delicate gastro system can only handle so much stress.

Anyhow, we can all agree that gas prices are killing us correct. Not just at the pump but in the grocery stores and other necessities.

See if this makes sense. In a previous post, I provided a link on an article discussing a record number of Americans stealing from their retirement to make ends meet. That would indicate they are needy. On the flip side we have oil companies that make billions of dollars in profit (billions!!!) in addition, they receive tax relief from our esteemed gov't on said profits. However, when the needy Americans earn some extra cash, we are taxed more. Just the basic logic alone should be enough to send anyone into a psychotic rage.

Well recently, the democrats decided that the oil companies should pay tax on their profits...sounds logical to me everyone else is
( http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/feedarticle/7576014 ). However, the republicans decided that no, that would be unfair. According to the republicans if the oil companies had to pay tax on their profits the prices would increase even more and reduce the quest for domestic oil alternatives. And of course, republicans pockets would not be as padded.

O.k. first, the oil companies have no incentive to modify prices now...increased profits and no taxes...hello. So just a quick accounting lesson. The average business owner inevitably wants a decrease in profits by the end of the year because they do not want to pay TAXES! Therefore, the average business owner has incentive to turn money back into the company to make a better more affordable product. A company does need profits but the average business owner has to claim that profit through efficient processes as well as customer service not through gouging their customers. Market prices for the average business owner are dictated by the economy...and supply and demand. Hence the problem with gas prices taxes on profits (or lack thereof) have nothing to do with it.

Secondly, have we seen ANY progress in the quest for domestic oil alternatives? I will admit, digging up green space in untouched areas does not appeal to me but I have not seen where all these billions of dollars have made any kind of alternative evident.

In an ideal situation, we would be able to tell the oil companies to piss off. However, fuel is a necessity in our lives. Therefore, it is our cares takers (gov’t) responsibility to ensure that we are not gouged.

It is “we” that have our heads firmly planted in our butts. The collective “we” could do something. Perhaps we can’t fight the oil companies directly but we could fight our local gov’t for alternative transport options. My town is very pedestrian and cyclist unfriendly. In fact, one has to ensure their insurance policy is up to date prior to venturing out on foot. Additionally, public transport is not an option for everyone. Oh we could also stop buying gas guzzling vehicles...if we don't then the motor companies have no incentive to develop alternatives. Extract the head people and do something.





We should be doing something…rant, kick, bite…scream rape.

Fear Not...

So, prior to continuing to making Americans look bad to our European neighbors, the current shrub in charge spoke about the current economy.

I shall paraphrase; essentially, the shrub told us that even though gas prices are psychotic and the economy looks terrible we Americans should remember that we did get the economic stimulus ( http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7443964.stm ) dammit...so quit your whining.

I am so relieved that the current shrub in charge had such a ground breaking plan to relieve the economy. That $600.00 I received will allow me to fill up 12 times at the station. And that is at current prices, "they" are saying that prices will continue to soar. Oh and let us not forget...we will be paying that stimulus back in 2009.

Fear not though, the shrub does not rest on his laurels. He has a good plan to beg for assistance from the European countries in... Afghanistan. Oh and if you can keep your food down whilst listening to his speech (I find pepto helps) you will also note that he is planning on pushing to dig up the continental shelf to extract more oil... another big "f" off to those who believe in global warming. Scientific proof...pshaaw.

But rest assured, according to the delusional shrub, the U.S. economy continues to grow in these trying times. That is why reports state that a record number of Americans are dipping into their retirement funds to make ends meet ( http://www.boston.com/business/articles/2008/06/06/more_dip_early_into_funds_for_retirement/ ).


So, as I am again being humiliated by the representative of my country to my neighbors in Europe, I have decided to adopt an English accent... lovey.

I Wonder...

Oooo, clandestine meetings between the two democrats. Well duh...I mean according to the platforms of both candidates the goal is to remove the republicans. So it only makes sense that they team up in some way. I actually hope the female runs for V.P. I would then be less nervous about the other ones agenda.

I find it humorous that every election Americans say the same thing "there is no good candidate to choose from so we must choose the lesser of the evils". I suppose it would be nice to have a "none of the above" option but good grief, we would never have a president then. I will say, each election people I hear state something like the aforementioned phrase imply that the current election is the only one like that. Frankly, I can't remember a time where the general population was thrilled with the candidates. However, I am glad I was alive to see the worst president in history take office. We now have a baseline because who could be worse (insert eerie music here...).

I was thinking (I heard the collective "uh-oh"); are there any emergency provisions in the constitution for the extension of a presidency? These thoughts suck for me because now I am going to have to pick through the stupid constitution. If not I will go mental.

I ask this question because I don't think the current shrub in charge is going to go quietly. I have this "feeling" that some type of drama will occur right before he is to be out of office. So I wonder if that were the case, would he be able to extend his stay? What happens under marshel law? We saw that the last time marshel law was in effect the government was able to invade our personal space. As a matter of fact, I think they still are...says the paranoid one who uses code names.

I Need a Nap...

I will repeat...I should have stayed awake in history class.

I am constantly bothered by the phrase "separation of church and state". The reason this bothers me is because I am seeing a melding of the two lately. However, I didn't truly understand the phrase...so I Googled it. I am glad I did. I first set out to prove myself right (I have a reputation to uphold). I proved some of my points but I also had to concede some.

I originally believed the statement "separation of church and state" meant that both organizations were to stay out if each others business. What I did not realize is that the phrase was developed to keep the State out of the church's business. The following article: http://www.allabouthistory.org/separation-of-church-and-state.htm explains that in an effort to avoid state denominational religion, the state promised to allow Americans their choice of religion and stay out of the church's business. However, Christian Theism was the assumed state doctrinal religion. Interesting stuff...there goes my argument for abolishing the ten commandments from government buildings.

So, I have admitted my error. Now, on to the rant. Although religion is not legally forbidden from entering into politics, the IRS only allows tax exempt status to religious organizations as long as they do not govern political activity (http://blog.au.org/2008/04/28/tax-facts-irs-reminds-churches-about-rules-governing-political-activity/). My question is, how much more governing activity does the IRS need before they withdraw the exemption status.

Here is one example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d5SEsKPLZ1U it is on video for Pete sake not much investigative need here. Do not become clouded by the link of the preacher to the new democratic presidential candidate... who cares about that. Just focus on the fact that a preacher (who is usually looked up to by parishioners) is attempting to sway (brainwash)political opinion on his pulpit. Oh wait....here is another one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hAYe7MT5BxM good grief...he even mentioned the opposing candidates name! Those are just from this campaign, the same thing was occurring during the current shrub's campaign as well.

So, where is the line? How much more do they have to say before their tax exemptions on property and income are revoked? Folks, we are talking millions (if not billions) of dollars of taxes that we peons make up for. If you or I violated the tax code you can bet the IRS would be on our doorstep. Oh but don't let me disparage the IRS...they are after all sending letters (see above article).

Maybe the napping during history was a good thing...education gives me an ulcer.

Oh My...

Sometimes I think I should have stayed awake in History class. The theory that the mind absorbs knowledge whilst resting is complete b.s.

Did you know that there are no term limitations for the Vice President of the U.S.?

This election, like the last two, bothers me. As far as I am concerned, the last two were fixed and the way our "democratic" election process works means that we have no say at the top level. I will clarify (because I usually get flak for that statement). If we, as voters, concentrated on electing the proper delegates, we might actually get a president that we want. Otherwise, forget about it.

So, here is what I think is going to happen (in my humble opinion of course)... the old candidate (I don't want to use names and end up on "the list") is going to have the shooter (you know...the current vp) for his running mate. That way the shooter can still run the country. I think the male democrat (aka confused one) is going have the female democrat (aka hubby beater) as his running mate. And I also think we are screwed either way.

The confused one has an agenda and it is not in our best interest. If he gets in then some strange stuff will happen. Honestly, my statements have nothing to do with skin, just small comments and actions on his part. For example, wasn't he the one who would not conduct his swearing in with a Bible? He used a Qur'an if I recall. While I understand tolerance and I am by no means a religious fanatic, do not flout the rules. So the delegates are going to put a guy in charge of the country that does not believe in the rules? Oh and let us not forget...the dummy actually used the words "typical white person" in a sentence.

Then we have the old one. I challenge anyone to convince me that the old one and the current shrub in charge are not in bed together. News reports say that they are purposely avoiding each other. Hmmm...so I think we have all worked in an office where co-workers are having an affair. What do they do? Go out of their way to avoid each other!!! If the old one gets in, we are looking at another shrub shooting administration. He has the same agenda as the shrub and we will experience a depression. As a matter of fact, I am convinced the money people schedule depressions to keep us in line.

Say what you will about the hubby beater, at this time, we need her and her beaten hubby. The hubby was brilliant with foreign relations and the beater has already run the country for eight years. We are currently in an economic crisis and they would be the ones to help us out. The confused one certainly won't, he is talking about aiding Africa...huh? Is there actually money left from invading Iraq?

Well my blood pressure is up...hypocrisy has that effect. I find it funny (not ha ha either) that as a country, we go out of our way to force democratic change upon other countries. At least the governing powers of other countries are honest about opression.

Red, Vacant, and Rocky...

So, I don't claim to be a super genius (well I actually do...) but I started to get curious about who funds NASA. The reason I am curious is because I would like to know what moron's have billions of dollars to flush down the toilet, or jettison to space as the case may be.

They really sent another stupid robot to Mars??? Really? Again? Good grief. For what I ask. I can tell them what it looks like for a great deal less than billions of dollars. Flat, red, and rocky. I could probably take some pictures of the local GA red clay and convince them it was the stupid planet.

Can you tell the difference??

I am all about advancement and what-not but this has gotten ridiculous. Did you know that we (as in the collective American "we") pay for this exploration? This article: http://www.cnn.com/2004/TECH/space/01/14/bush.space/index.html states that as of 2004, NASA had an 86 BILLION dollar budget.

However, this current mission only has a mere $420 million budget (http://www.nytimes.com/2008/05/26/science/26mars.html?em&ex=1211860800&en=018febdf02cea7f0&ei=5087%0A) is that all? Geez...I'm not sure what I am complaining for then...bad economy, rising gas prices, housing crash, health care issues...shame on me.

So I guess it's screw you Americans with no health care...our government would rather explore vacant planets over and over again. So, those of you un-insured sick people out there should help the advancement of inane space photography and just check out. I think I would actually feel better if they took the taxes I paid and just tossed the money out the White House window.

At least I discovered who the morons are...

Cleavage and Leavin' on a jet plane....

As usual, I am way behind the times. However, I just see my delay as extending a holiday; for on St. Paddy's Day Mr. P delved into some raucous fun!!

Mr. P had the good fortune of riding shotgun in between some lovelies during an Irish jig. Of course he was beside himself (and two others). Breathing became difficult after a bit (as he was forgotten about) but after extraction, his grin could be seen for miles. However, the jig must have jogged his noggin a bit because his eyes were jittering for a few days after (that could have been a result of the close encounter though).

Next, Mr. Penguin is off to San Fran to achieve dreams of greatness. His traveling companion is sure to take him pub trolling especially since some final sports game is showing on Sunday. Make sure to watch your back Mr. P!!!



Stay tuned for the updated travels of Mr. P.

I think I'll go for a walk...

Think twice, good friends, before blindly accepting the advice of the medical profession. They are only human after all.
In the following article on CNN.com (http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/03/24/NotDead.ap/index.html) a young man says he “feels pretty good” after being pronounced dead. Apparently after a wreck this 21 year old was comatose for four months and then declared brain dead. As the family was paying their last respects, the fellow wiggled some limbs. Fortunately, he was able to communicate in some small way because they were just about to harvest his organs. The irony is he stated, "Just makes me thankful, makes me thankful that they didn't give up…". Mr. Dunlap, I would like to point out that had you not moved your appendages, currently you would be spread across America in igloo coolers.
Can you say “Living Will” boys and girls???

Insecure????

We all have insecurities. If you say, you don’t then you are unable to feel and should be discharged from the gene pool.

Back to the insecurity generalization. If one genuinely cares for other people as a whole, then they will feel insecure about their placement within society. Hence, insecurities. Again, if you have no insecurities then you don’t care what your fellow man thinks of you and you are unable to feel compassion or empathy…jump out of the pool.

The question is, how do we handle our insecurities so we can still fit in with society (without being a rambling idiot). Stop feeding them. All insecurities need food for growth. If you continually act in such a way to feel poorly about yourself, you are feeding the beast. Make an effort to live with no regrets. If you can wake up each day knowing you did the best you could, the insecurities shrivel and die. However, if you act in a way that you know is wrong, you will feel poorly about yourself and the insecurity will grow.

No Smoking, No Drinking, No Napping?????

Well folks, add napping to the list of health risks. According to new studies, older folks who catnap are adding to their risk of a stroke. Seriously??? Frankly, after that report I think the elderly are more likely to have a heart attack because who, after 60 or so, can stay awake (hell, I can't stay awake now)???

Modern medicine is quite laughable really. If we believe everything we read we shall have to seclude ourselves in a bubble and exist on filtered air until we wither and die. Oh and don’t be silly enough to take a prescribed medication, good heavens, the side effects may certainly outweigh the benefits.

For example, there is a drug call Amitiza for…well let’s just say blockage issues. Here are some of the side effects according to the patient pamphlet:

Nausea, diarrhea (well duh!!), gas, vomiting (Hey! wrong end!), dry mouth, runny nose, cough, fever, headache, dizziness, joint/back pain, or trouble sleeping (probably to because of jumping up from the diarrhea) may occur...symptoms of a serious allergic reaction may include: rash, itching, swelling, severe dizziness, trouble breathing (who needs to breath as long as you can go…).

That is just the abbreviated version; the complete list is excessively long to post. Personally, I will take the blockage.

Here is one more for laughs. A drug called Ativan for anxiety….roll side effects please:

Drowsiness, dizziness, loss of coordination, headache, nausea, blurred vision, change in sexual interest/ability, hair loss, constipation, heartburn, or change in appetite may occur…memory loss, shaking, difficult/slurred speech, vision changes, mental/mood changes (e.g., depression, including rare thoughts of suicide), trouble breathing (especially during sleep), stomach/abdominal pain, yellowing of skin/eyes, dark urine, seizures, easy bruising/bleeding, signs of infection (e.g., fever, persistent sore throat), unusual weakness, low body temperature…symptoms of a serious allergic reaction may include: rash, itching, swelling, severe dizziness, trouble breathing.

Just the symptoms alone cause me anxiety. Say no to manmade drugs…you never know how worse it could be.

Info dug from WebMD: http://www.webmd.com/drugs/index-drugs.aspx

This Just In...

After determining the inevitability of being smoted by the almighty, resulting from a mild indiscretion on the altar (well come on…his diet consist of sardines…it could happen to anyone), Mr. P turns to various vices to ease his guilt.

Determining that cider was more suited to the ladies...Mr. P doubles up with some manly Guinness.

Well o.k. so they are Baby Guinness but he felt like a man that night.

Repentance....

In an effort to redeem himself...we find Mr. P asking for assistance from the highest order.

Fortunately, no heavenly electrical events occurred when our aquatic friend approached the altar.

However, the question remains...will candle lighting save our flightless friend?

How to Get Through a Day...

...mild insanity often helps to get through the drudgery. With the pressures of human existence in a money conscious society, one has to be a little off. Therefore, we look to the travels of our wonderful non-flying aquatic avian friend to lighten the load.

Recently our own Mr. P travelled to Ireland. Of course, whilst there, it would have been terribly rude of our friend not to partake in a bit of cider.

Look out Mr. P!!! Don't fall in...